all of this prove that i am really crazy about arashi back then
but i'm not like that anymore.
i still like arashi but not as hard as before
maybe the age got me
Posted at 04:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
i really don't understand you syud or Nur Syuhada. i already apologize to you but i think its not enough. you really want to keep biela to yourself. take it, i don't care. yeah right now i know that i may sound jealous. do you guys really want to wear the same blouse, watch, socks, shoes and many more. its annoying you know that. i know that you guys are BFF. but you don't have to all of that to show to everyone in the school. i may sound like a coward because i don't tell all of right in your face. i just don't want the whole classor the whole school to know that i hate you. i don't want people keep staring at me or talking behind my back. i just want a quite school life ok. but your attitude its just annoy me. i know that you are really good with kids in our class. and i know that they like you more that me. and i also know that all of the teachers like you. it just makes me want to puke ok. i write this because i want you to read it but i have writed all about my feeling towards you at blogspot. but you just can't seem to forgive or try to understand me. you keep ignoring me at school although sometimes you still talk to me but i know you hate it, right? you have write at your blog that i'm an arrogant person, right. but don't forget that you also famous for being arrogant ok.
there's someone that say, if we get close enough to that person, they don't mind if we use unpolite words. but you, syuhada you don't feel like i'm close enough to you for me to use that kind of words right. i think its you who doesn't want to be friends with me. last year its just a coincedence right. at that time you doesn't have friends, so did i. because our good friends tranfered into a boarding school. and then we became friends. then biela tranfered back to our school. then you started to talk more to her than me. i really thought that we can be a good friends but i was wrong until now.
so i will endure this until the end of spm. after that maybe i will ask you why you don't like me or not. so we'll see until the end of this year.
what i can say right know i really hate you and i hope you will dissappear from my life
Posted at 10:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Posted at 01:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
seems like veryone around me has change. now they think when they gonna get married and they want a boyfriend. seems like that i'm the one that haven't change. but i don't really care if i have a bf or when will i get married because i have many dreams that i want to accomplish. my good friend in form3 also have change. i don't them anymore. seems like they are getting further from me. maybe i have to start thinking about my future and act a bit mature. when i text them, they won't reply immediately like they use to do. maybe because they have new friends and right now that they have study at town. maybe they don't want friends like me who is just a village girl. i don't know. right now i don't know who are my real friends. maybe i don't have real friends. i really don't know. can someone please tell me what i have to do. i don't know what i will do after i take my SPM and what will i do if i fail in my SPM. i really don't know. my dreams is that i want to around the world and learn other culture. i also want to promote my country to the world. but right know that dreams is just a dream. i'm really lonely when i'm at school. i think i maybe a little bit picky about friends. all of my old friends have went out from this town. and it will make me when will i get to go out from this village. even though right now i have less that one year before i get out from this village. right now everytime when i said something my friends will deny everything that i said. not everything though just a little bit.
Posted at 06:10 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
i really like arashi new song. and its not that slow like their song last year. its not that i don't like it. it just that, they sang to many slow song last year. and i can't wait to see aiba's new drama.
the pv's preview
and i just found the full song for lotusPosted at 08:57 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
why kpop fans will do extreme things if someone don't like their idol. i just don't get it. sometimes i always says to my freinds that i don't like shinee and choi minho. then she will just scould me and don't want to talk ro me. i'm just joking. its not like minho is your boyfriends right. and when i say that i don't like lucifer why you just cannot accept that i don't like the song. when you say that you don't like arashi song's i just accept it because everyone has a song that they like. but you ust say that song is the best and a lot more. its for you not me ok. i really don't like that song. and i also don't like the concept. i have read something from fb that kpop fans have really punch one of the admin of jpop page. and when their idol said aome actor or actress is their ideal type, the fans will hate that person. i just don't get. do you want your idol to said that you is their ideal type although they don't you. its just impossible. and i really don't get why kara and snsd what to remake their korean song into japanese. can you just debut in japan using korean and see how you will become popular. besides that kpop fans also cannot accept if their idol will act in a kiss scene. you just have to accept it because that is their job. ok. its not that they haven't kiss before they debut. maybe some of the artist have not kissed yet but not all of them. kpop fans also will attck the host of a program if the host get close to their idol in that show. after the show ended they will send curse email to that person. i just don't get it.
Posted at 08:38 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)
Posted at 04:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
what have i don't wrong to you guys. i already feels like that syud doesn't hate me like last year. but why now i feels like that again from someone else. did i do something that will upset you. i really don't get it. and i also feels that biela has been further away from me now. maybe they have to endure my devil like personality. i really feels bad for them but i don't know how to change myself. i really think that you guys are my friends but i just feels that i have been left alone by you guys or is it me that further myself away from you guys. people always say that history will repeated itself right. it is repeated because we don't learn from the past. i also think that i like that too. i want to talk to you guys like last year but i just afraid that i will hurt you feelings again. i really don't mean it to happen. it just that i have a loose mouth. and i also don't think before i talk. so i regret saying somethings to you guys. it just come out from my mouth like a reflex. last year when i have a problem with syud i really don't what to think is it just a friends quarrel or we have become enemies but deep down my heart i don't want that to happen. but there some part of my heart at that time that really hate you. so i really don't what to do at that time. this is why i don't what to really get close to you guys because at the end i will hurt your feelings. but i also cannot live all alone in this world. i also need a friends but i just don't know how to treat them nicely. all i think is about myself. why i beeing like this. last year i have realise many things about myself. i know that i have a loose mouth and the result for having that is everyone hate me, besides that i also a selfish person, i always get away from taking tasks that the teacher told me by having a good friend in presenting and doing works. i also know that all this time that i'm arrogant. i really don't realise it sometimes. and i always looking down on the boys in my class when i started to talk to them but its not that i really mean it. i really regret it when i think about it when i got home. it just that i'm nervous talking to them because they almost never talk to me. so i really don't what i suppose to do. i really hope that someone can give me a good advise...
Posted at 05:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
i'm so boring and right i'm so sad
right know i have problems with my friend. and when i ask her she just said that she's not mad with me. but i can saw it. you that. why you don't want to tell me what the things that i did to make you like that. biela says that you are mad with me about something. i also heard what you say to your sister in the phone. although i don't know all of it but i know you guys are talking about me. i think even if i apologize, you're not going to accep it. and i know why you're still talking to me. and its all because of biela. when three hangouts you just talking and have fun with biela but not me. it really make sad and sometimes it really piss me of. even in school you try to avoid me. and when i want to talk or walk together with biela you just snatch her just like that. i know that i'm not the kind that can find friends easily so can you just let me be friends with biela. she is the only want at that school who still can understand me. some of my bff is at another state. i feel really lonely when i went to school. sometimes i just felt that i don't want to go to school but i still go cuz i want to accomplish my dream. and deep down in my heart i still want to be friend with you but somtimes i also thought why i want to be friends with someone that doesn't like me anymore. if i really don't want to be friends with you anymore i still have to see your face for another year. but i don't want that to happen because before this we have many happy memories together and i still want to create many memories with you. but if you don't like me anymore i just have to accept it.
but thank god i still like arashi. you guys really made my when i'm in sad and lonely. your songs made me to endure any problems and face it. when i saw you guys i really hope that i can have friends like that.
Posted at 02:02 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)
i really like this pv
its so beautiful and it make me remeber of one love pv
Posted at 10:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)